Pig With a Purpose: The True Value of Pocket Change


One of my favorite and earliest childhood memories is how my dad would come home from work every day and empty his pocket change into this big, clear jar on his dresser. Slowly, that jar would fill up &  and when it started to get near empty-ing time (hardly ever did we wait till it was actually FULL), my sisters and I would add in any change from our (sad) little piggy banks and the fun began! 

For awhile we put the coins into wrappers, we learned to sort them, count them, and break them up into equal piles once they were sorted by coin type, it was a fun learning task, a fun thing we did together. After sorting we would all go to the bank and get cash. Later on, though, we found a magical new way to do things…

Suddenly we could pour the change into the AMAZING coin eating machine! This magical being somehow counted our coins and spit out a receipt that dad gave to the bank tellers and in return, they gave us… CASH!! WOOHOO! 

My dad would give each of us girls part of the pot – sometimes it was more, sometimes less. Sometimes more pennies, sometimes more quarters. Either way, we each got some money and that was so exciting. But we would also talk about how some people don’t have as much as we do, some kids don’t ever get $5,$10,$20, they don’t even get new toys or special ice cream treats or in the worst situation we could imagine the kids didn’t even have 3 meals a day or a house with enough rooms for everyone, enough beds, or heat during the winter.

My dad often bought groceries for families in need, spent time at school checking in with the kids who lacked a healthy support system at home, and he was available around the clock, 24/7 for the staff and families that worked/attended the school where he was principal. He is truly a beloved pillar in our community. I was, and still am, always so proud of him and all he does for others; he is a true inspiration. 

So even though we wanted the money for ourselves, we learned how to be empathetic and we experienced first hand that it is a HUGE GIFT to be able to GIVE. I am so thankful to have two parents who instilled this in us just by being them, just by showing  it in their day to day actions and words. They never ask for more, never complain or want, they give all they can and sometimes maybe more than that. 

I can only hope that I will be able to do so much good for others with no underlying goal for approval or recognition, simply b/c we are inspired and driven to do so. 

****************************************

If you and/or your children have a piggy bank that is awesome, if you do not have one but would like to start one, I absolutely encourage you to do so. Whether you donate or keep the funds to yourself it is a fabulous way for kids to learn about money, learn about money management or how to spend some save some, or how to be generous and donate!

If you want to donate, I can recommend a fabulous cause 😉

If your child would be interested in helping create a package for a young newbie tubie around their age they can sponsor a Newbie Tubie Care Package!

You can do this through a monetary donation or you can purchase the items to put together a package for a specific tubie based on their age & interests!

We have online wishlists via Etsy & Amazon – book wishlists, button buddy wishlists (purchase an animal for me to create a button buddy – animal with matching feeding tube), tubie essentials on Etsy, and then we have shopping guides to tell you what we include in each package, that way you have a guide to follow as you shop in person or online!

It’s an incredible gift and it means so much to our tubies, young or older, to know someone put these items together specially for them! It’s also a great experience for gift GIVER. Learning early on how great it feels to GIVE is an invaluable lesson that no amount of rolled up pennies, or even quarters, could buy, it is a “live it to learn it lesson.”

We have lots of young children & young adult tubies (mostly ranging from ages 0-36, but also older tubies) so sponsoring NewbieTubies of any age (child or adult) is welcome and SO meaningful, truly SO appreciated! You can make anonymous donations, sponsor anonymously, or you can send a card with your info so that the tubie you sponsored can get in touch if they want to do so!

I will link our wishlists and provide contact info so you can let us know if you have any questions or want to get involved in any way aside from making a donation.

Thanks for reading and share if you can! 

ETSY MUST HAVES: https://www.etsy.com/people/rsb4fc/favorites/newbie-tubies-wish-list?page=3

AMAZON:   

MAIN LIST: https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/1J7LHVRD4V3A6?ref_=wl_share

BUDDIES : https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/W9IXBH9TFV4A?ref_=wl_share

Sponsor a Book! https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/A2HGIE93P9BL?ref_=wl_share

PAY PAL: positivelyrachel101@gmail.com // VENMO positivelyrachel/positivelyrachel101@gmail.com

Shop Away, Newbie Tubie Style

Below are NewbieTubie Package shopping lists and links to our wishlists for items we are in need of right now! This list is current and we keep our wishlists updated based on supply!

We are so thankful for each and every donation, we truly cannot do this without your support and generosity! We are in need of donor support for products as well as for shipping fees to keep going, so share our posts to help us reach more donors so that our loyal followers and community don’t have to keep funding it 😉

Thank you in advance and please don’t hesitate to reach out with questions or suggestions on fundraising or other possibilities ✨

ETSY: https://www.etsy.com/people/rsb4fc/favorites/newbie-tubies-wish-list?page=3

AMAZON:   MAIN LIST: https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/1J7LHVRD4V3A6?ref_=wl_share

BUDDIES NEEDED: Purchase A Buddy to sponsor a button buddy! Add a note so we know who it is from and we will send you photos when we create the Button Buddy and send it out! 

https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/W9IXBH9TFV4A?ref_=wl_share

Sponsor a Book! https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/A2HGIE93P9BL?ref_=wl_share

PAY PAL: positivelyrachel101@gmail.com // VENMO positivelyrachel/positivelyrachel101@gmail.com

SHOPPING LIST: ITEMS WE NEED: 

MINI GERM X – you can get these for 97C at Walmart as well as at any pharmacy or the dollar store! It is SO important that our recipeints have these while they heal, especially since they are having surgery during COVID19. So when you shop for yourself in person, for pickup, or online, add in a few for Newbie Tubies! 

MINI Q-TIP Containers! We need q-tips! The travel sized ones are PERFECT for our care kits! You can find them RIGHT BESIDE the MINI GERM-X at walmart for 97C or at the dollar store for $1! What a steal! We put these in EVERY PACKAGE we can! 

BARRIER CREAMS – We need barrier creams (similar to diaper creams!) for our newbies to use as their stomas (tube sites) heal! 3x antibacterial ointment and calmoseptine also work, if you find them in small tubes we can send those out! Off brands accepted!

CHAPSTICK – We are out of chapstick and it is almost that season again! Any type of chapstick is accepted, so send us your favorite kind to share with a newbie!

FACE MASKS/Self Pampering- (Skin care masks, not surgical/COVID masks, tho we do need those , too!) We love including care items as well as spa/pamering items like face masks & epsom soaks and nail kits to let people do at home pampering post op! A little self care is always comforting and makes you feel nice and fresh, so send us some of your favorite face masks and soaks or any other self pampering products so we can send those out!

FACE MASKS – AGAIN? We do love including surgical masks, so if you make cute COVID masks, send them our way!

Baby Bath & More – We need baby bath supplies as well! Fun items like bath paints are always great but also sponges, towels, bubble bath, and bath toys are welcome! We also use baby socks, chewies, and all care items.

Onesies – Solid colored onesies – if you have any of these on hand or see them on sale, send them our way!

FUZZY SOCKS – who doesn’t love these? 

TUBIE ITEMS- We always need tubie pads, clips, tracheostomy pads, and more! Our Etsy list is the place to go!

BOOKS – What are some of your favorite childhood books? We collect books for children ages 0-10, so donate any lightly used or new books that we can include in packages! We put at least one book in each child’s package; whenever possible, we include a book written about tubies! We have a “Sponsor a Tubie Book” list on amazon that has books written specifically for/about tubies! That is linked here!

Like buddies, the books on this list can be such fabulous tools for kids to learn about feeding tubes and alternative feeding! They help explain the “why” and “how” in a non-scary way that helps kids feel a lot more comfortable with the tubes, both tubie and kids who are siblings or children of a tubie, classmates, friends, etc. 

Both toys and books are a way kids learn about the world and normalize, so reading about feeding tubes with young kids can make them into something they are aware of, have a basic understanding of, and don’t consider to be icky or scary or weird. How cool is that? Kids are truly incredible in how open they are to learning and how ready they are to accept new, different things if we make them open and available to them. 

BUTTON BUDDIES – We are always looking for stuffed animals to use to create our Button Buddies! We do accept lightly used bears if they are in great shape and haven’t been kept in bed with you or chewed on by babies or dogs, etc. We also have a wishlist on Amazon that has lots of fabulous options that can be sent directly to us! 

Button buddies are a tubie’s best friend. They are a learning tool for newbies and fabulous for showing children how to care for a tube, to show they are not scary or bad, they are just another way to eat! We encourage parents with young tubies to use button buddies as a tool to normalize the feeding tube for the tubie as well as their friends, siblings, and classmates. Books and buddies are a huge gift to a newbie, they truly bring light to their eyes and joy to their faces. 

Buddies are also a comfort when you are admitted, traveling long distances to see doctors, and having infusions or shots or any type of treatment! No matter the age, having a buddy can bring some comfort, and any amount of comfort or joy you can bring into such a serious and scary situation is a huge deal.

You now have the opportunity to sponsor a buddy! Simply purchase a stuffed animal from our wishlist on amazon (or anywhere else) and it will be sent straight to us where we will create the button buddy! Make sure to add in a note with your name and contact information so we can send you a photo of the buddy you sponsored and who it went to! 

We include Button Buddies in as many packages as possible, and thanks to both AMT Medical Supply & ESutures we are able to create & send these to so many more tubies! We couldn’t do that without their generosity. 

Thank you to everyone who reads, shares, and donates to our efforts. You are all making a difference for someone who’s is in need of happy mail and love, so you can feel good about that. Sometimes giving feels even better than getting, and I can guarantee that this is one of those times 🙂

Button Buddies

When I got my first feeding tube (oh so long ago), my mom made me a “button buddy” by hand and to this day, that koala, Kevin, goes with me on every long trip to the specialists, every hospital admission, and is always arms reach away when I’m not in my “safe space” or when I’m struggling to feel strong and positive about my situation. For me, my buddy represents the love and support I recieve from my mom and the rest of my family as well as the strength and perserverence I have had since getting my first tube, my first diagnosis even. Kevin has two tubes and a central line now, and he’s been a trooper through it all.

25488709_10210870166166969_1779141679_n
Kevin, my “tubie friend,” has a central line & tube(s) like mine!

My goal this year is to spread the love and the comfort that my button buddy has brought me with as many of our “newbies” as I can, and that’s all in thanks to our donors who have donated the tubes and stuffed animals or the funds for our animals and the shipping costs it takes us to send out our packages. We’ve had incredible donations from both AMT (Applied Medical Technology, Inc.)and eSutures Medical Supply Sales, both of whom are making it possible for us to send buddies to an incredibly increased amount of tubies this year than any year past ( we are still always looking for low profile tubes) and I just can’t wait to share this with you all….

 

IMG_1662
thank you AMT for the tubie bears!! what an incredible donation, I’m humbled and overjoyed.

When I was a little girl I LOVED my dolls. My first american girl doll looked just like me and I took her everywhere. We wore matching clothes and I even cut my hair to match hers (big mistake). For me, my dolls were so much more than just toys to have fun with, they brought me joy and comfort whereever I was – especially since I was so shy and often needed that “security blanket.” 

It’s not difficult to find dolls with wheelchairs, crutches, glasses, even diabetic kits and dolls who are beautifully bald, but feeding tubes? No. Those are still something that doesn’t even cross most people’s mind’s – and that is why I’m here.

With toys like these kids are able to share about things that may otherwise be difficult for them to communicate or to understand; through play they are able to learn from one another and see all of these new things in a way that is not scary or confusing, just kids being kids – all together, blind to any differences, and every child deserves that, tubie or otherwise. 

Button buddies allow children to be involved in as much of their loved one’s journey as possible in a way that helps them grow and understand the unknowns and the things they may be fearful of in the beginning. For instance, if the buddy goes to a child with a parent who is a tubie, the child can watch while their mom/dad is “eating” or doing fluids or changing the dressing and the child can use the buddy to do these tasks along side their parent! The same is true of siblings of tubies, classmates, and tubies themselves as they learn to care for their tubes and go through procedures, hospital visits, tube replacements, and feeds or medications that they have to do daily.

Buddies have the ability to provide comfort beyond the normal “safety blanket” item that most have and are attached to as children, it becomes another warrior in your battle and another supporter in your journey.

 

The beauty behind playing with these toys is that there is no recognition of the differences in toys, there’s no judgment, no prejudice, simply children playing together, learning as they go, growing, and that in turn becomes them accepting of one another with no qualifications, no recognition of the differences, just as they saw their toys.

When I give a button buddy to one of our little tubies and they see that tube, the light that comes into their eyes is just incredible. Suddenly that toy with a very expensive piece of plastic in its tummy changes how even the “littles” themselves see the feeding tubes! 

IMG_3006

You can so clearly see  that the  button buddy – a stuffed animal –  has the power to change how these children view their tubes from being a medical device that makes them different  into a part of their body that makes them special, that their tubes are not scary or gross or something to be ashamed of. When they fell in love with their Button Buddy tube and all, they have accepted themselves – tube and all.

———————————–

If you want to sponsor a Button Buddy you can do so by making a donation of anywhere from $12 (for just the animal) – $30 (for the button & “surgery”) – each bear is valued at $30 and shipping is $8-$15 each.

PayPal & Venmo are both @positivelyrachel.com

You can also purchase an animal and send that to us to use to create a buddy! We have an amazon list or you can pick one out on your own and ship it to us!

Here is our AMAZON Buddy link!

https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/W9IXBH9TFV4A?ref_=wl_share

Xoxo

Rachel

 

Strength for All; A NTCP Shirt Fundraiser

In October of 2017 I had my GJtube surgically changed into two separate tubes – a jtube and a gtube – after months of tube trouble due to my severe dysmotility throughout my GI tract. This surgery was insanely painful due to complications brought on due to my EDS, so my recovery was long painful, and during that time I relied on my parents for EVERYTHING. I couldn’t sit up in bed on my own, couldn’t walk, shower, brush my hair, or seemingly do anything else because all of these movements require abdominal contractions/tension and every time that happened I was in excruciating pain.

It was during that time that I began thinking about how lucky I was to have my 24/7 support team who were there for me always, no matter what, no complaining, and I just couldn’t bear the thought of anyone going through this alone, so I decided to be there for every tubie I could. Chronic illnesses are one of those “find out who your real friends are” situations and it can be brutal and shocking seeing who it is who puts the effort in, my goal is to step up and be that person when I can, but also to encourage others to do the same; so two years and lots of work later, over 300 packages have been sent out to first time tubies. 

To celebrate this milestone we’ve started a shirt fundraiser to raise money to contribute to Newbie Tubie Care Packages! 

Living with chronic illnesses or other conditions that cause one to be unable to eat enough to sustain themselves on their own and cause the need for a feeding tube is incredibly challenging, and that’s a massive understatement. Imagine life without your favorite foods , without the ability to go out for ice cream or coffee or a drink with friends, not sitting around the table and eating thanksgiving with your loved ones, having to come up with options not involving food for social gatherings or first dates, and explaining to people why you aren’t eating or what that little knobby thing on your tummy is.

Feeding tubes require incredible strength and self awareness, they are life changing, but they are nothing to be ashamed of, they are a gift that gives life back to more people than you would ever imagine – young and old, boys and girls, and due to so many different causes or conditions, feeding tubes are so much more than just a life sustaining piece of plastic, so join us in spreading awareness and celebrating year 2 of Newbie Tubies as well as the gift that so many of us are given through feeding tubes – the gift of nutrition, energy, and a life we may not have had without them.

Whether you’re a tubie or not, purchasing a shirt shows your support and love for tubies and contributes to our care package program that sends packages (free of cost) to first time tubies. No matter where your strength comes from, these shirts represent that strength.

We run on donations and these shirts are super cute, so it’s a win-win! You do not have to be a tubie to be Tubie Strong!  Purchase a shirt for yourself and wear it proudly, no shame, just strength and power in your self and appreciation for the gifts we often take for granted.

Thank you so much <3

*Link below! Currently open until Nov. 21st.*

**SHOP HERE!**

you can also donate to PayPal @ rajinone@aol.com or check out or wishlists on Amazon or Etsy!

Love & Gratitude,

Positively Rachel

The Myth of Malnutrition

Lets talk malnutrition. 

Malnutrition is one of the most misunderstood medical concepts; it’s complicated and can present itself in so many different situations and with differentiating signs and symptoms in different people. When you hear malnutrition you probably think of pre-me infants with failure to thrive, kids in africa, or people caught in blizzards on Mt. K, right? The extremes? 

What you don’t usually think of is 16 -30year old females who have previously led healthy, active lives but all of a sudden stop processing food. And then there are the little kids, 3-8 year olds who just cannot absorb nutrition and gain weight and strength like they need to be doing at that age for developement. Can you imagine? Most of these people end up on tube feeds or IV nutrition in order to get nutrition and hydration, in order to stay alive. 

Another myth about malnutrition is that you must be skinny if you’re malnourised. I mean if you can’t eat you lose weight right? No brainer. But no, that’s not how it always works. The body can do one of two things when you are malnourished, it either begins eating away at any extra fat cells you have and then eventually turns to muscle as well, leaving you skinny, weak, and easily dizzy, clumsy, tired, and in pain, OR your metabolism shuts down and you begin packing on ANYTHING possible, any sugars, carbs, liquids, etc. are stored as fat and you begin gaining weight even if you hardly take in 200-1000calories a day.

Being a “gainer” as they say can be extremely difficult both physically and emotionally. You aren’t eating, you aren’t getting to enjoy your favorite foods, yet you’re packing on weight with no explanation. It’s unfair, it’s uncomfortable, and it’s often extremely difficult to turn around, nearly impossible to reverse no matter how hard you try, no matter how much you exercise or how little sugars or carbs you take in. 

People who are not educated on this topic don’t always take people seriously about their nutritional level if they are not underweight. They must be lying if they are gaining right? Wrong. Our bodies are just different, and we may not know exactly why, but it happens, and that’s a fact, not a myth.

 

Mindful Impact

Mindfulness. It is just amazing how big of an impact our thoughts can have on our bodies, on our ability to heal. It’s important that you fill your mind with optimistic or positive, healthy thoughts and your life with all of the things that have always brought you joy, all of your hobbies, and the people who put a smile on your face.

Today’s technologies allow for incredible connections; there is a huge online presence of “spoonies” (as we call ourselves) all over instagram and facebook, both individual pages and group pages! This resource is a HUGE gift to those of us who suffer from severe illnesses that leave us homebound or bed bound with little to no social interaction, but there are cons to this as well.

When you surround yourself with individuals who are sick, and you are sick and have been for a long time, it begins to feel normal. You start to forget what it feels like to be healthy, to be a functional, productive person. When you start to feel that way you know it’s time to reevaluate your perspective, remind yourself of what makes you feel like YOU. Not sick you, not healthy you, but YOU.

Be mindful, know your limits physically and mentally. Will all of these posts from other sick chicks –  some of them trending towards competitive over who is worse off, some who seem to thrive off of the attention from being sick – make you focus too much on the sickness? Does life revolve around illness? Because it doesn’t have to; no matter how sick you are, you are more than your illness.

There’s a lot more to mindfulness than this, but it’s a start. I encourage you all to focus not on your illnesses, not on symptoms and treatments and bad doctor visits, not of scary unknowns and dooming diagnoses, but on all of the aspects of your life that were there before illnesses, that exist independently from illness, that bring you simple pleasure, joy, distraction, love. Positivity. Light.

When Life Gives You Limes

People often use the expression, “when life gives you lemons” when things aren’t going quite right, you’re likely familiar with the phrase? Well, humor me as I explain why I’d like to adapt the statement to, “when life gives you limes.”

In my opinion, lemons are tasty and you can do so much with them, many options being super simple! For example, of course you can make lemonade, then there is lemon cake, lemon bread, lemon cookies, pie, and more! I mean lemons are great for tea, detoxing, or simply put in your water. Lemons are just so handy, but limes? Limes are a little bit more complicated, they’re slightly more sour and although you can use them in drinks and recipes, it’s not quite as common, kind of like chronic illnesses – complex and uncommon.

That said, I have quite a few limes in my life. I’ve been diagnosed with over 10 chronic illnesses, a handful of which are seriously debilitating and progressive. I’ve had to take medical leave from the school of my dreams, now having watched my classmates graduate without me, and put my future goals on hold. Because of my symptoms– mostly nausea, pain, and fatigue– most days I am not even able to leave home and I spend majority of my time in my bed resting and sleeping.

I have new limes thrown at me every time a doctor gives me a new diagnosis, every time a treatment doesn’t work, and every time I wake up feeling worse than I did the day before. However, I’ve learned to take these limes and use them to help me find all of the gifts in life, all of the things that I am so thankful for. When you’re given challenges, sour moments, it really teaches you to be so much more thankful for every little moment or object that makes you feel joy.

Some of the sweet things in my life that regularly help me get through the sour moments include my dogs, Baxter & Dexter, my family, good music, and my online support network. There are also little gifts day to day like a 75 degree day, a special visitor or getting something in the mail, being able to take a walk, an Epsom salt bath, taking a drive and seeing pretty scenery, etc. Lots of small things bring me joy, and I am so appreciative of every happy moment I am given.

I’ve had a lot of curveball limes recently, broken tubes, line infections, flare ups of pain and nausea, exhaustion, and doctor troubles to name a few, but I’ve learned to put up walls that keep all of this from affecting me too much, only allowing through the smallest amounts of stress or worry possible – the last thing I need on top of my illness happenings? Extra limes.

Learning to filter out some of the extra stressors, even the smallest things you may hardly notice can make a big difference in the long run. Hold on to every happy moment, every simple pleasure, and let go of negative energy; hold no grudges, and never go to bed or leave your loved ones angry. Forgive, love, laugh, and remember not to waste precious time on trivial issues. When life gives you limes, take a moment to find your own sweet moments and happy thoughts, play your favorite song or cuddle with your dog, text your best friend or your mom, take time to express yourself, share your love and gratitude, spread the joy in random acts of kindness, random words of affection. Life is too short to be sour.

 

Medical Madness: Survival of the Introvert

I’ve always been a bit of an introvert, my parents often tell me that when I was young, my teachers said I hardly spoke a word, I was polite and hardworking, but quiet as a mouse, which my parents thought was odd since I often talked a lot at home J I’m shy and often have trouble making friends, I have always hated confrontation or having people be upset with me. I worry about running late or being in the wrong place at the wrong time… I’ve got a lot of thoughts and opinions and knowledge, but being introverted and having trouble sticking up for myself in tense or questionable situations, it can be a major downfall when you’re living like I do.

Getting sick at such a young age with conditions that so many doctors don’t even know about let alone know how to treat. Since I was young and still living at home, my parents were always with me at doctors appointments – still are today J — and they were able to help me express things fully and ask all of the questions I needed to, ask for help with whatever needed more attention, but I still often got overwhelmed.

Being sick so long I’ve begun running my doctors into retirement, and of course with that comes the need to begin the draining search for new doctors, a task that brings difficulties in many ways. You’d think that after almost 8 years I would be able to do this on my own, to handle doctors and keep focused and calm and get everything out of it that I need, but that’s just not the case. You never know what you’re walking into with new doctors; each has their own protocols for testing and treatments, they believe in different approaches, and you have to explain your history in detail, which gets longer each time.

There are so many biases against girls like me with “invisible illnesses” simply because of my age, gender, and appearance, and the worst part is that those biases and judgments don’t just come from stupid high school kids or young adults, they come from doctors, from insurance, from pharmacies, from all of those who are supposed to be the ones making my life, making my body at least feel a bit more comfortable, a bit more active, a bit more NORMAL.

After a few bad experiences with doctors and nurses and hospitalists, some being members of my own care team, the medical professionals who hold my life in their hands, and that kind of brutal betrayal can lead patients like myself to extreme anxieties and even medical PTSD, which makes finding new doctors a terrible thought, a stressful time for me, and on top of that, I have to be brave enough to get through these appointments feeling like I’m in good hands.

Doctors are supposed to “do no harm,” but that concept is flawed and misinterpreted sometimes; “do no harm” isn’t a pledge meant just to protect us from doctors intentionally causing harm, doing things to make us sick or cause us pain, etc., it means do all you can to help your patients no matter who they are and what they have. There’s so much that happens behind the scenes of the medical system, doctors with prejudices who feel they have a right to be rude and judgmental and negligent when we know something is going on and we are asking for help. Negligence is a crime just as serious as purposeful, physical harm.

Why do you get to decide what I’m feeling, what the symptoms or side effects can or cannot be based on a decade old case study instead of putting trust into the patients, the ones living this, the ones suffering every day while the professionals get to wash their hands and go home without another thought of how their actions or lack there of are affecting us. I may not be a medical professional, but I am definitely a chronic illness expert, and if doctors could truly understand that, we could work together, creating trust and mutual respect.

A wise woman once told me that I need to remember that doctors work for patients. I think doctors forget that and take advantage of their position and their capabilities, the things that only they can do or get their hands on. We need doctors, we need the resources they can give us, but they need us, too, and they need to keep in mind that those of us with chronic illnesses aren’t your average patient, and we know our stuff.  No one knows chronic illnesses better than the patients themselves.

Since there are no options for spoonies to join the medical field based on our personal knowledge and research, it would be incredibly beneficial if our doctors and insurance agencies and dieticians, pharmacists, etc. would take us seriously and use our advice, consult with us more so than just making the decision and saying that’s that.

We do so much of the work, so much of the research, and all of the first hand experience, yet we still rely on the “professionals” who are making these decisions without listening to the answers we are offering.

Adventures of Mummy & Her Little Tubie

I’m excited to share a post written by one of our Newbie Tubie Mamas who is the mama of a little tubie and agreed to share a bit of her journey with us! This is a great opportunity to read a bit about raising a tubie from the perspective of the mother…

“There were times I’d sit and wonder how the hell we were going to get through this, how can we live like this forever not being able to feed our baby who’s starving and also failing to thrive anyway so needs every bit of milk he can get.

Our little man is now 8 months and has all of his nutrition via a feeding tube. Some days your baby’s screaming for milk and you can’t feed him because you can’t get the right aspirate – this could take us hours. It does get easier I promise!

I’m very lucky my husband is amazing with our children. He’s definitely the more practical thinker and I go into full research mode and sit and think what if. I have managed to tone down the googling – my husband made me promise I’d only google it if the doctor had spoken about it or it was in one of his reports and that really does help. Your then looking at specific information rather than a whole load of case stories of children who have completely different medical histories. I do find that being prepared helps my mental health, but only if I’m preparing for the real thing, not something from google that ends up being way far off from what’s really going on.

It also helps that he’s a very hands on Dad so I know when I’m in hospital with our youngest that the others are safe and happy at home with their Dad who also manages to keep the house going while I’m away. They spend lots of time visiting us because at the moment they’d rather be with us at the hospital but when the time comes that they don’t want to do that anymore we will be respectful of this and put other plans in place.

Our children have been amazing, they find it really tough and it’s so important to remember that this isn’t easy on them, either. They’re young, but they see the complexity, they see when we are upset, they want to know, so we tell them what’s happening but also try and keep their lives as normal as you can. We try and make sure they get to all their clubs, they have friends for tea or we get them on days out as we would have done before.

Siblings are a great gift to our tubie, but we have to make sure that each child feels loved, appreciated, and individually important to us and to everyone. Each one makes a huge difference, is an inspiration, a source of strength and light and joy.

During feeds it can be difficult to pick your baby up without messing up the pump, kinking the tubing, or making your baby uncomfortable from the feeds, and as caretakers, moms especially, all you want to do is hold that sweet baby! There are often extra steps when doing these basic, instinctual habits, and when you’re a parents, that can be extremely frustrating and disheartening. Eventually, the medical supplies falling out of all of your closets and the tasks that come with tubes and chronic illnesses become part of your daily routines, it all just becomes second nature – scary thought, right?

It’s all about finding the right mindset, but you first have to almost grieve the life you thought you were going to have with your new baby. I cried for hours that I would loose that bond by holding him to feed him; I can assure you I was worrying over nothing our bond is stronger than ever! We still get plenty of cuddle time and when he’s feeding I’ll often sit next to his cot and hold his hand, play peekaboo or tickle him. There are lots of opportunities for bonding you just have to look for them.

I woke up one day and realized this was our life and we’ve got two choices we get on with it, build our little man up and hope one day he stops aspirating or we sit and sulk about it which gets you absolutely nowhere! Life doesn’t stop for a feeding tube, feeding tubes allow life to get going again, it allows children to BE children, it is just another way to feed your little one.”

-Hayley Smith

If you have any interest in guest posting, I’m always happy to share different perspectives and pieces from fellow writers 🙂 Email me/contact me through the blog if you want to talk about it 🙂

 

Sponsor a Book for our Little Tubies

I grew up with two early childhood educators, so books have been a staple for me since day 1, and that is a true gift my parents gave me. Books help us learn about the world in a fun, visual, and age-appropriate /understandable way, teachings us the simplest of things like letters and animals to right and wrong, to all you can do when you grow up, and how to be the best YOU that YOU can be, whatever that means.

Books are part of what help us learn about new and different things we may come across, and it’s important to give children resources to help them be aware of all of life’s diversities and that being unique is never something to be ashamed of, so authors include all sorts of characters and situations in books that help prepare kids for life, even if the kids think it’s all just a story…. What about books for kids with illnesses? Children with wheel chairs, bald heads, or feeding tubes?

When I started Newbie Tubies I had a goal to help all of my “newbies” have all of the important information and to feel as supported as possible, and to learn love and acceptance for their new gadget and for themselves. Some people have a harder time than others with this, and that is completely fine, but sometimes you need to let those around you help you get to that point by letting them support you and accept you and your tube for you to see that your tube doesn’t change you, it just keeps you around…

Well, back to books, sometimes it can be hard for our littler tubies to adjust when they go to school and all of a sudden are thrown into a world where peers are eating lunch and bringing in cupcakes for birthdays and you’re no longer in the safety of your home, but both tubie and classmates start to see differences, even at a young, young age, and it’s time to bring in the books to help normalize tubes, to make all of the classmates learn through the avenue they know best – books.

For the same reasons, picture books about tubes can also be very beneficial for adult tubies who have young children or work with young children. Visual, audio, and hands on awareness and normalization is more than we can ask for, and starting young, starting by reading these books to the next generation is just awesome.

If you’re interested in sponsoring a book for our packages, we include one in each package we send to our little tubies and we appreciate every donation! I’m attaching the link as well as the list, so if you have a tubie of your own and want to buy a book, there are quite a few great options!

Our “Sponsor a Tubie Book” wish list on Amazon carries some FABULOUS tubie books for our young tubies! Click HERE to go straight to the list, the names of our most used books are listed below in case you shop elsewhere 🙂

 

BOOKS!

“The Adventures of Team Super Tubie”

Kristin Meyer

“Tubie Kids Like Me”

Annette Fournier

“When My Brother Got a G-Tube”

Jordan Tarbutton

“My Belly has Two Buttons: A Tubie Story

Meikele Lee

“Emma’s Special Tummy”

Paula

 

My Tubey Series by Rhiannon Merritt-Rubadue (full series on amazon!)

“My Tubey Goes to School:  A My Tubey Book”

Rhiannon Merritt-Rubadue

“There’s More Than One Way to Eat: A my Tubey Book”

Rhiannon Merritt-Rubadue

“My Tubey: A Day in the Life of a Tube Fed Girl”

Rhiannon Merritt-Rubadue

“My Tubey: A Day in the Life of a Tube Fed Boy”

Rhiannon Merritt-Rubadue